Thursday, August 8, 2019

Distraction Doesn't Fix Anxiety and Depression

One disadvantage to  having  ADHD, anxiety and depression living in the same skull is that you tend to let distractions enter your life and use it as a coping mechanism to deal with daily issues.  Some might think distractions are the way to go. Heck, one might argue that Cognitive Behavior Therapy is a giant distraction exercise to get your mind out of the fog. But after getting a wide variety of therapeutic approaches, I can say that distraction never deals with  the root of the problem. That's not to say that distraction doesn't have its merits, it just means that distraction won't be the pathway to long term solutions.

This is a picture of me almost 10 years ago when I was president of the Seminole Club of Baltimore. 

Stacy Mizrahi at FSU Leadership Conference
Stacy Mizrahi at FSU Leadership Conference 2009
See that big smile? Yeah, I may of been happy at that moment, but I was a big wreck. My work with the alumni was a giant excuse to go out, drink beer and socialize. Sounds like fun, right? Unfortunately, the alcohol consumption was fueling my depressive episodes, which I wasn't putting together at the time. I would drink to help relax after anxiety spent the day kicking my ass. Then I would obsessively read about football and drink to lower my anxiety about the results of the game. I spend most of my football watching shouting and screaming at the TV (or at the stadium if I was attending a game). So my distraction was both anxiety inducing and would eventually induce depression.  Once in a depressive state, I could be in it for days. Does this sound like fun? Hell no! And week after week I would subject myself to this, trying to convince myself that I was living a rich life doing things that no one else did. 

Stacy Mizrahi with Jimbo Fisher
Stacy Mizrahi and Jimbo Fisher
Here I am with Jimbo Fisher the year he took control of the football team. Great photo op, the coach and some guy that's two drinks away from jumping off a building. The distractions kept me alive, I guess. But I never got anything close to recovery in these days. I was actually digging my depression into a Grand Canyon sized issue. I wish I had one of those time traveling  DeLoreans to go tell that guy to get some help (me and  the coach). I can't see happiness in any of these photos because I know the pain behind the smile. Too proud and pigheaded to get help, and too distracted to put in any effort. If there is any lesson here, its to those currently struggling: don't  find solace in distraction.

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